Warehouse 13 - First Quarter Impressions

Ever since last summer’s cliffhanger finale, I have been languishing in anticipation of Warehouse 13’s second season premiere. And now, eight months later, here we are! What high-octane hijinks and action-packed artifact-retrieval await us in this brave new season?

Episode 201 – Time Will Tell

Slapdash, poorly scripted ones it would seem. Hrmm.

The writers have tasked the premiere with two chores. The first is to resolve last season’s “MacPherson” finale. We are not talking about an episode with a conclusive ending, with a “Six Months Later” premiere. We are talking “The Best of Both Worlds, Part 1” here – Picard/Locutus informing the Entreprise that “resistance is futile”, and Riker giving the order to fire on the Borg cube. We are talking “WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S TO BE CONTINUED?!”

So. This episode is about fallout.

The second chore is to set up the new season’s over-arching plot arc. What new and exciting conflicts are going to challenge our trusty Warehouse agents from without, and possibly from within? Out with the old, in with the new, and all that jazz.

Folks, I was disappointed. Not so much by the clumsy execution of these two chores, but more by the out-of character moments. Pete, whom I adore, is the good-hearted goofball whose intuition and empathy lead him toward the heart of the mystery. In the premiere, the writers substituted poor decision-making for intuition. Pete is sacrificed to the god of Plot Progression, and acts like a dolt to facilitate a new recurring character’s introduction. That’s weak writing - it seems like the creative team simply couldn’t conceive of any other way (aside from damaging the character) to advance their plot. For any aspiring writers out there, if that is a wall you ever encounter, please take a step back and think about why you’ve up come against such an obstacle before trying to awkwardly force your way over it.

Artie and Claudia’s dialogue doesn’t suffer from the break, thankfully, but I am inclined to believe that this is due to the fact that a script would have to be catastrophically bad for Saul Rubinek to be unable to salvage something from it. Allison Scagliotti has good chemistry with Saul and shines when the writers don’t weigh her down with irritating science-hipster lines.

At the end of the day, the episode accomplishes its objectives, but not without consequences. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, and my heart seems to have spent the eight intervening months between finale and premiere ironing the wrinkles from the show. The premiere reminded me that the show is not infallible; there will be moments of bad writing, bad dialogue and weak story-telling from time to time. That wasn’t what I wanted out of the episode, but perhaps that cold-water-to-the-face sensation was necessary.

Episode 202 – Mild Mannered

Alright, the premiere is in the rear-view mirror. What have you got for us this week, creative team? Special guests stars Jewel Staite and Seah Maher, of Firefly and Stargate: Atlantis fame? Well, we know one of them did it. I don’t know what “it” is yet; regardless, I'm positive one of them did "it."

Here’s the thing, though: Warehouse 13 has a great track record of bringing in nerdy guest stars for non-antagonistic roles: Joe Flannigan (SG:A), Joe Morton (Eureka), Niall Matter (Eureka), Michael Hogan (BSG), Tricia Helfer (BSG), Mark Sheppard (everything). So that whole “it” thing? Fuhgeddaboudit.

The episode goes a long way towards repairing the damage from the premiere: solid one-shot artifact mission for Myka and Pete and amusing Warehouse sub-plot with Artie and Claudia. I admit it’s a little formulaic, but W13 is not intense, searing drama – I’m here for the great banter that occurs when the cast and the writers are firing on all cylinders. If they keep delivering that within their Ghostbusters/X-Files/Antiques Road Show formula, well, I’ll keep watching.

The characters are being written properly again, so my major issues with the premiere are gone. The episode never really moves beyond the “Special Guest Stars!” novelty it advertises, but it's fun. It's certainly a move in the right direction.

Also. “It”? Yeah. Totally right.

Episode 203 – Beyond Our Control

Right up front, folks, this episode is great. This is the calibre of episode that kept me coming back for more last season. Formula is simple. No guest stars, no season-wide implications (or are there...?), just a straight-forward artifact retrieval. That the artifact is apparently in the Warehouse’s current base-town of Univille allows the creative team to reveal a little more of the show’s universe.

The episode also features the ham-fisted introduction of potential love interests for Pete and Claudia later in the season. First off, Pete and Univille’s local vet, are at each other’s throats at the outset of the team’s investigation. The nonsensical nature of their antagonism screams looooove interest. I suppose it could be ridiculous characterization, but I thought we’d gotten past that, creative team? Still, my Vegas money says love interest, because, well...duh.

Meanwhile, Claudia bumps into Michael Cera’s less successful younger brother at Univille’s local hardware store. Hey, you know what would be cool? What if he wore Buddy Holly glasses like Rivers Cuomo and half of the hipster population of America? Perfect. The audience will love this guy’s slightly awkward charm for sure.

PROTIP: Michael Cera is trying to not be Michael Cera these days (well, for Scott Pilgrim’s sake, we hope), so maybe his brand of awkward-chic is not what you should be affecting right now.

Not digging this guy, and that is certainly not because I have a ridonculous crush on Claudia (when she isn’t being fed those science-hipster lines). I suppose that if Wonder Twin is the worst part of the episode that means it’s been pretty good overall. It’s definitely the best example of W13’s fun formula so far this season.

The Concise Conclusion which Reduces the Complexity and Effort of the Body of the Article

Ladies and gentlemen, we’re back to good. While Warehouse 13’s second season started off rocky, a few misfires here and there, the creative team is getting back into the swing of things. Beyond Our Control is a great example of what the show does best and as I wait for the fourth episode, Age Before Beauty, to air next Tuesday, I am hopeful for a season that features entertaining and exciting challenges for the Warehouse crew, as well as a greater exploration of the world it inhabits.

More on Warehouse 13 at the half-way mark.

Superman 701 - Thoughts

Far too often are the abilities to “leap tall buildings in a single bound” and to “move faster than a speeding bullet” the primary signposts we use to describe the first and the greatest superhero in comic books. With his red cape and his blue tights, Kal-El, aka Clark Kent, aka Superman, is an icon of heroism which towers far and above all other characters that have come since (this coming from a Bat-fan). However, J. Michael Straczynski wants you to see beyond the cape. Beyond the tights. Beyond speed and flight. Beyond heat vision and ice breath. To see beyond Clark’s super-strength and bear witness to the simple strength of character that he represents.

The latest issue features a peripatetic Superman traversing the continental United States. As the story opens up, he is surrounded by journalists of all stripes looking to uncover the motivations behind the Man of Steel’s seemingly ordinary gait. This is a populace aware of Superman’s history and mythos. The inquisitive ask if he’s encountered any red kryptonite, if he is on a secret mission, if there is an ongoing crisis (“There’s always a crisis”), or if it has anything to do with magic. Even Lois Lane, the lady love, takes a private moment to ask Superman/Clark the same questions. Supe claims he is merely walking, to no destination in particular, with no crisis in particular looming.

The plot revolves around Superman acting like a regular joe. Naturally this elicits some rather surprised reactions from those he meets, whether he’s eating at a local diner or assisting the police with a potential roof jumper. All throughout, what strikes me, the reader, as somewhat tragic is the populace’s perception of Superman. They are unable to see that it is the man behind the myth, the mild-mannered Clark Kent, that inspires hope to countless millions (in the DC universe and in our own). There is no Superman without Clark, whose simple, down-to-Earth sensibility is what truly awes. It is this perception of Superman as the iconic hero which has become a crutch. The trope of the secret identity, that which guards loved ones from retribution at the hands of a hero’s enemies, is how the average individual foists their responsibility on their anonymous defenders. One pedestrian out walking his dog asks of the Man of Steel:

“World’s going to hell, and you’re on a walk. I mean, shouldn’t you be our saving the world or something? You’re a hero, right? Isn’t that what heroes do?”
(Superman 701 29)

Isn’t that what heroes do? They save us – from alien conquerors, mad scientists, serial killers, thieves, drug dealers. They save us from all that threatens to do us harm, all the evil in this world and all other worlds across the great fictional cosmos. But how do we ask Superman to deliver us from evil when that evil is inside ourselves?

This issue is pretty straight-forward as far as narrative is concerned. Superman is walking across America and he is offering help here and there. But Straczynski’s project seems to be more of a meditation on humanity’s complacency in the shadow of their super-powered guardians. Superman has saved the world countless times from the menace of Braniac, Lex Luthor, Bizarro, Parasite, Metallo, Mr. Mxyzptlk and so very many others over his seventy years of caped crusading. But how do you save the world from apathy? Intolerance? How do you fight our cruelty? How do you fight our despair?

How does an author write that?

I have never read a lot of Superman in my lifetime. Quite frankly, I find that few writers have the necessary skills to make the character relevant in this day and age. He is a symbol of hope and idealism in a period that no longer celebrates those virtues the way they were a half-century ago. However, JMS is a writer who taps into mythological themes and has the capacity to craft new dimensions to familiar characters. This has worked with varying degrees of success – his run on Thor is a delight to read, though his work on Spider-Man became a little strained as he went on (Spider-Totems?). His work in Superman 701 fills me with hope. JMS makes me feel the weight on Superman’s shoulders. He makes me feel Superman’s desire to help people improve their lives. To become better people. JMS’ Superman makes me want to be a better person.

Buy this issue and judge for yourself. It is not a breakout issue with any new talent. The art is good, but not amazing. The writing is not BAM! POW! sensational. But it tells the story of a man who fell to Earth, who was raised by good, honest people and who only wants to help us be good, honest people in return. It tells a story of hope, and it has the potential to be the jumping on point for a truly remarkable story of not just superheroes, but of ordinary, everyday heroes. The kind of heroes you and I can be.

See you in line for Superman 702.

Comics This Week 3: Now aboard the HMS Slash

I apologize for letting my inner slasher take over this post. Please not there will be SPOILERS.

Booster Gold #34

Just when I thought they couldn't stuff any more homoerotic subtext into Booster Gold, I get proven wrong.

This issue was fun. This issue was funny.

Let's talk about it.

The cover is very well done and striking by Kevin Maguire - who insists on drawing the same facial expressions on everybody, but those expressions are awesome so it's all good. Max is on the cover, which kinda makes sense since that's why Booster's going back in time to the JLI era, but Max never turns up in this issue, so I dunno.

Chris Barista is on main art duty, whose art is decent, and he has a good handle on character interaction and facial expression that lends itself to Booster. Keith Giffen does the sections in the future and it's not his best work, art wise. And I'm not even sure if I like his penciling style even when he is on top of things (he has drawn Zatara in fishnets, which gains inexplicable points in my book).

Keith Giffen and JM DeMatteis are on art. They're wordy, but hilarious, and their interaction between characters are second to none. More importantly, the new creative team has rescued a title I was loosing faith in, just above dropping into a title I get excited about and downright love.

The colourist Hi-Fi seems to like rendering and bright bold colours. I don't like over-rendering and think that some of the colour combinations are eye-twitch inducing. ...I don't think we'll get along.

Things that happened!

The first page starts with Blue Beetle and Booster Gold running away from a horde of fantasy-esque warriors in a "What crazy hi-jinx are they up to now?" sort of way. The captions are cute and fourth-wall breaking. I would be lying if I said that I wasn't giggling.

Time travel is confusing, so when I say it goes back to the earlier events in the story in the future, trust me on this. Booster's sister Michelle has come back just in time to get in on a debate Booster and Rip are having about Rani, Booster's new “daughter”. I rather like Rani, so I cheered on Michelle when she kicks Booster in the pants and gets him to keep Rani.

Booster decides to try once again to go back in time to the JLI era for proof of Max Lord's existence. The first thing he runs into... Ted "Blue Beetle" Kord!

Ted and Booster quickly settle in back to their old back-and-forth snarky ways, a trope that in general I will eat up every single time. And Booster can't take his eyes off Ted, and lets Ted drag him away from his Mission. That's tick one on the Homoerotic Subtext Sensors (HSS for short).

Also Beetle says "Look, I don't know what bug you've got up your butt today-- _{wow that was a poor choice of phrase.}" Tick two on the HSS.

Skeets is all "Booster, Mission - plus maybe hanging out with your dead best friend isn't best for your sanity." and Booster's all "I just want to hang out with him for a few hours. It's time travel! What could go wrong?"

Anyway, so a book written by a dude who took a look at the Book of Destiny^TM has been stolen from this secret Vatican church place. Booster and Beetle are going after it - but after seeing the footage of the not-Dormammu dude who stole it, they decide they need help and go to Mr. Miracle and Big Barda.

Who tell them no. Until they realize that maybe the fate of all creation rests on Booster and Beetle, so they say yes.

Booster makes a cute point about how maybe his idiocy is a defensive reflex about being in the past, and gets a punch in the nose for it from Barda. So they go to the planet/dimension where the book was taken, and they run into a dragon, and Barda punches it out.

BARDA PUNCHES OUT A DRAGON.

The four of them snark a little when they find a castle and have to decide on how to attack. In the castle, this blue guy with a terrible fashion sense is monologuing. Not-Dormammu turns out to be blue guy's servant, complete with a funny accent and calling him "master".

Not-Dormammu offers his master a foot rub. What's that, HSS? Another tick?

^{P'upik vs Dormammu}

Blue guy turns him down, and asks for the Queen, and not Dormammu says "The Qveen? Vhat do you need vith her -- vhen you haffe me! She --" [sic] Villain dudes! You're being more homoerotic than Booster and Beetle and that takes effort.

It goes back to our heroes, who are sneaking into the castle. Booster's thought bubbles reflect on how he's changed. Beetle notices that Booster's emoing and asks what's bothering his friend. Awww. Barda says: "Do you two think you can save the couples therapy for later?" Barda has a HSS too!

Then the mob of fantasy-esque guys from the beginning of the issue catches up with them.

The issue ends with a page in the Future with Michelle packing away her Gold Star uniform. Dani is rather curious about it. Hmmm.....

Justice League: Generation Lost #5

This would be the second Booster Gold title this week. I know, I know, team book and all that - but Booster's pretty much running the show. ...That felt weird to type.

Aaron Lopresti is on art this time, and his style is much more to my tastes. Booster has eyes! He does, hover do things I don't like. Beat panels that are just copy and paste (I don't mind beat panels, but people do change expressions slightly, and redrawing it makes it look a lot better than seeing the same panel repeated. And Blue Beetle (Jaime Reyes this time) looks more angry and bulky than he should (I have my priorities).

This issue starts with a flashback in Booster's past to the future (goddamn time travel) which forms the first of the bookends. I may have gotten distracted a little by the extremely pretty Booster here.

^{Thank you, Therkla}

Anyway, I'm not going to describe the entire issue (I saved that for Booster Gold this week), but it does have some very nice Captain Atom, Ice and Blue Beetle character moments. And an amusing character moment from Red Rocket.

Booster's still running the show, though. And that still feels weird to type. (Although, Max Lord is running the show too, I guess)

Sketch Parody of the Week

X-Men 1 - Thoughts

A new Issue #1 from Marvel? My goodness! And it's a new X-Title? I dare say, will Marvel’s publishing innovations never cease?

Honest truth? I’ve been waiting for Second Coming to wrap up so I could buy back into the X-Universe, and Marvel's NUMBER ONE stamp on this title gulled me pretty easily. So, putting away the cattiness, how is this new launch issue?

Short answer: it’s not bad.

Perhaps I needs must elaborate.

Paco Medina’s art is serviceable on this title, but does nothing to wow the reader. It’s all pretty average. Average isn’t necessarily bad, but it sure ain’t great. It gets the job done. Same goes for the characters. Successful comic characters all have a defining physical appearance which creates continuity across the varying artists across the years. Look at the X-Men: Wolverine’s claws, Cyclops’ ruby glasses, Storm’s white hair, Angel’s wings, Emma Frost’s corset and cape combo, etc. You get the picture.

For me, exciting and dynamic comic art arises from the interaction between such defining physical characteristics and an artist’s unique style. Remember Skottie Young on New X-Men? Remember Chris Bachalo during the Supernovas arc in Adjectiveless X-Men?

Skottie Young - New X-Men 43 | X-Men 188 - Chris Bachalo

This. This is what I mean.

Bachalo and Young’s respective styles gave their renditions of the various X-Teams an ineffable quality; they leave a distinct stamp which states that they were there. They have added to the legacy of these characters.

Not every artist can achieve this. Paco Medina does not, at least not in this issue. Almost nothing truly leaps off the page to make me sit up straight and take it all in (though I will admit that his Wolverine in the two page spread near the end of the issue is quite solid). My biggest complaint has to be his characterization of Pixie and Jubilee. If they didn’t call her by name, I would have no idea who Jubilee's character was. She seems so bland here (a symptom of depowering and disuse, methinks). It will be interesting to see what the creative team’s long-term plans are for her re-introduction into the team. And what the hell happened to Pixie? It would seem that, like all X-Girls, she has matured into a beautiful, well-proportioned young X-Woman...with the exact same body type as every other young X-Woman. Honestly, if you took recent renditions of Pixie and just swapped heads with Kitty Pryde or the Cuckoos or whomever, I probably wouldn’t be able to tell that it was a shop.

DESPITE the pixels.

And DESPITE having seen several in my day.

But I should lay off Paco for a minute. I mean, the art may not be amazing here, but it’s not that bad either. And my characterization beefs are the legacy of other artists which he has inherited. The action is fairly well done, and I get the feeling that Medina’s chops are going to be more apparent when the vampires start coming up more in later issues and the X-Teams need to go to town.

Slack. I will cut him some.

On the scribe side of things, Gischler’s writing is pretty good. Really though, I read X-Men comics for the dialogue, the interaction between the team members. The ways in which all these folks all come together and try to be a team, try to be a family, is what gets me to open my wallet at my FLCS, and that isn’t really the focus of this issue. That’s to be expected somewhat, as this is the first issue. Gischler has to set up his story, set up the arc's main players, and set up the potential conflicts to come. He does that about as effectively as he does in Curse of the Mutants’ prologue Death of Dracula (read about it here). The difference is that the reader has particular expectations for Cyclops, Storm, Wolverine and Co. – these characters have baggage and so do we, the readers.

The same as with Medina, I have to ease up on any criticisms of Gischler here: this is only the introduction to our post-Second Coming X-Men. I will have to give the title a few more issues to see if Medina and Gischler can follow through on the responsibility of crafting a strong reading X-Perience (sorry...couldn’t help it).

Short and Fast:
• Art’s not bad, but doesn’t *pop*.
• Writing’s not bad, but doesn’t *pop*.
• Characters are not bad, but don’t *pop*.

Conclusion:
• Apparently there ain't a lot of *POP* in this issue.

All that being said, I'm still glad I picked it up. Curse of the Mutants seems like it could be a fun summer story-arc, and if nothing else, X-Men 1 does set the mood for this Vampire vs. Mutants slobber-knocker.

Death of Dracula - Thoughts (Spoiler-Free)

I was unfamiliar with the creative team for Death of Dracula, Marvel's latest big ol’ 48-page one-shot, so I just dove right in and trusted my luck.

I’ve gotta say, it worked out pretty well.

In searching for ways to summarize Victor Gischler’s writing, the best comment I could come up with was this: Death of Dracula is very well paced. All of the players that are to be developed and expanded throughout the narrative are introduced in the first three pages. Right away, the reader knows that there’s some large vampire convocation, knows who’s at this convocation, and knows which characters to be following - Gischler sets up his story pieces quickly and neatly. Now that might seem pretty basic to some; perhaps, but the ability to provide simple, straight-forward narration is a skill that not all comic writers have so I appreciate it when I see it.

My favourite bit of plot is Dracula’s moment in the sun. Hmm, doesn't sound like a very apt metaphor for a vampire, does it? Dracula is introduced with a catty, yet menacing rebuttal to an underling, listens to another underling flap his gums for a page, and then gets stabbed in the chest with a stake. BAM! Three pages between character intro and character outro.

Metaphor makes a lot more sense now, don’t it?

Artist Giuseppe Camuncoli is another argument in favour of picking this issue up. His style is rough around the edges, which serves the characterization of the different vampire sects well. Must have been all that gritty Hellblazer work on his CV. His pencils give rise to different creatures in order to emphasize different tropes: some vampires are grotesque, others are sensual; some are exotic and mysterious, others are demure and peaceful. Camuncoli leaves little doubt in the reader’s mind as to the variety of Marvel’s vampire community nor to the danger it presents.

The title of the one-shot is Death of Dracula, and this creative team ain't fartin’ about. Big D is out early because what is important is putting Marvel’s undead house in order. This is a “Bigger Picture” issue, pure and simple: a new day is dawning for Marvel’s vampires (as it were...), and Gischler and Camuncoli are here to ensure we have a greater perspective on the events to follow.

Anyone interested in the Curse of the Mutants arc should definitely pick this up.

Curse of the Mutants - July 7 at the Stands

As X-Men: Second Coming wraps up in X-Force 28 (July 7) and X-Men: Second Coming Finale (July 14), we watch as five years worth of X-Stories come to a close. But as this chapter closes, the opening salvos of Marvel’s new summer X-Event: Curse of the Mutants hit the comic stands this past Wednesday!

So, here’s the plan:

First Step: head on over to your Friendly Neighbourhood Comic Shop and pick up your copy of X-Men 1. Marvel has launched a new adjectiveless X-Title, what with the old book becoming X-Men Legacy back in early 2008. It’s got a big ol’ Curse of the Mutants banner running down the side, and a rather awkward depiction of Cyclops’ package that eerily draws the eye. Still with me? Okay good.

Second Step: find a copy of Death of Dracula on the comic stand. Does it say X-Men on it? No. Does it refer to the Curse of the Mutants arc? No. Just a golden banner for Marvel’s The Heroic Age and a prominent picture of Dracula with a stake in his chest. Found it? Alright, add it to your weekly stack. It is the official prologue to the Curse of the Mutants storyline. The storyline it in no way references.

Third Step: thank your Friendly Neighbourhood Comic Shop employee for ringing you out, and go get to reading!

This Week's Comics 2: Lovin' It

This was a pretty good week. Please note there will be SPOILERS.

Avengers: The Children's Crusade #1/8

This is a Young Avengers title in everything but name. It's written exactly as if it were just a continuation of the Young Avengers story, and the Avengers are only in there about as much as they were in the first two stories. This is a good thing for me since I rather like the Young Avengers.

Allan Heinberg on writing with some nicely worked in exposition and snark. Jim Cheung is on art, and he;s quite a good artist despite his tendency to make everybody float in space during group shots and drawing everybody with the same face. The colouring is pretty decent, and one thing I like is that it changes depending on the quality of light, so good job Justin Ponsor.

Alright! So this issue starts with an intro page which has a really corny description of the Young Avengers that I skimmed the first time because cringe. It then warns about discrepancies. Excellent. MST2K mantra here we go! And seriously dudes, don't apologize for not putting Steve in his new outfit because his new outfit isn't that good. Although, maybe Cheung could've pulled it off... I just like how aware they are of the nitpicky nature of their audience.

So there's a short introductory scene with the YA fighting some crazy homophobic white supremacists, with a nice lampshade on the nature of the team, what with Billy and Teddy going out and Patriot being black and all. The little snarky lampshade Hawkeye pulls instantly warms me to the book, making me remember how much I like the Young Avengers.
Hulkling kisses one of the Sons of the Serpent on the cheek to piss him off. I think I might love this book.
The Avengers show up! Serpent dudes take Hulkling hostage! Wiccan gets pissed off and releases a surge of knocks them all comatose and freaks out the Avengers like whoa. (Counting down jokes about "It wasn't the nuke that went off... it was Wiccan" in three, two, one...)

Que pages of the YA and Avengers bickering about Billy and his powers. Them bickering is a staple of YA so I don't really need to describe it. What does happen is the Avengers tell the YA about the Scarlet Witch and House of M. Oooo. And Billy's all like "She was totally brainwashed or something right?" and the Avengers were all "No she just went crazy."

Steve Rogers forces Billy to come live at the Avengers mansion until they can figure his freaky powers out. Excellent dickery there, Steve. Teddy comes along for the ride because, you know, boyfriend. Billy and Teddy have a cute moment that Speed totally cockblocks by coming to 'rescue' them. "Making out" my ass. Putting a hand on a cheek does not "making out" make.

Anyway, so the Young Avengers bust them out and they decide to go looking for Scarlet Witch. There's a nice moment with Cassie and the whole Scarlet Witch-killed-my-dad-maybe-she-can-bring-him-back (after all, she did bring back a couple of people already).

And surprise reveal of the issue that I won't give away! Let's just say that I gasped out loud, yet if makes perfect sense. Somebody else is coming on their mission, and they're awesome.

Secret Six #23

Pretty cover. Little bit stiff, though.

Alright, so John Ostrander on writing. The quality drops accordingly whenever Gail Simone isn't writing. I don't think he quite gets Ragdoll's "voice", and his dialogue is too... plain, I guess. I miss Gail's wit. Do I have any real complaints other than "It's not Gail"? Hrm.

RB Silva on art. Decent enough, except for the heads. My god, the heads look lopsided and always slightly too small for the body, Jeannette's face was bothering me the entire time, and the eyes are all really small except on Ragdoll.


_{Oh jeeze, I'm sorry, but you should fire your plastic surgeon.}

So the story starts with a couple of dudes fighting each other, and the minute they start talking I'm all "These guys are douches, I hate them already. Am I supposed to hate them? I hope so, 'cause I do." Luckily, I'm right.

They talk and they talk and I'm just waiting for the heroe- err, protagonists to arrive. Seriously, can this intro get any more frustrating? Then a couple pages of the Six snarking to each other on a plane before they're kidnapped, separated and hunted.

Well, they defeat the hunters so easily it was almost embarrassing. Almost, until I remembered fuck those guys. The six kills them all and that's the issue.

Yeah, boring.

Thor And the Warrior's Four #4/4

1) I really like Gurhihuru's art. It's clean, it's cute, it's nice, it's expressive, it's dynamic. My life is now a better having seen Baby!Asgardians. Also, there's a couple of fun touches, like Beta Ray Bill's hair.


_Hehehehehe

2) Alex Zalben is a decent writer, and his plotting is pretty good. The pacing is great, and the emotion is good. This isn't somebody who writes a kid's comic and sleeps on the job. So well done.

3) I love this comic.

4) This comic makes me happy.

5) This comic isn't afraid to have a couple of emotional punches. Alex's character gets a couple of really good ones this issue.

6) It was worth getting the issues for the covers. Hee.

7) Coleen Coover is awesome. That is all.

Atomic Robo v.4 #4/4

See, one of these days I'm going to do a recommendation for Atomic Robo because it has recently become one of my favorite comics ever.

Last issue had Dr. Dinosaur, and I mean, it's hard to live up to Dr. Dinosaur. But this issue tries admirably. Saying this is "not the best Atomic Robo issue" is like saying that "Cars is not the best Pixar Movie" or "Hush isn't the best Batvillain" or something. Still pretty awesome.

A ghost turns up at Tesladyne (1999), and tests are done on the poor newb who spotted it. Then they do some tests on the ghost with a checklist as a framing device. "Is it incorporeal?" ect. They decide the ghost is impossible.

Atomic Robo keeps running into impossible things.

Turns out uh shadow from time is Thomas Edison, and him and Robo get into a hilarious pointing and shouting match before finally informing Edison that he died some years ago.

It looks like Thomas Edison might be a recurring villain.

And that's awesome

Parody sketch of the week!


_{Stealin' jokes from Yahtzee...}

Comics You Should Read 1: Beasts of Burden

Big or small
Short or tall
Here's what happens to us all
We go to sleep
We close our eyes
And leave behind a nest of flies.
- Traditional Canine verse

Beasts of Burden just came out in a very nice hardcover that isn't even expensive. Is it on your shelf? No? Why on earth not?

Want to check it out? The first few stories are online at Dark Horse.

The Premise
A group of dogs and one cat live on Burden Hill, a place being increasingly plagued by supernatural happenings.

This isn't your normal talking animal story. It is creepy, it is sad. It is also weird and funny.

The dogs all have different personalities and different breeds to emphasize that. Also of note is that they seem to have their own religion and legends. That being said, sometimes they act like typical dogs, and it never feels so personified they might as well be humans. The comic wouldn't work if they weren't animals.

The Characters
There's a whole slew of interesting charming characters. I happen to like them all.

It does take a while to match er, muzzles to names, but because of the difference in breeds, you always know who is who.

It also subverts expectations a little; the doberman Rex is a coward.

The Art

Jill Thompson, watercolours.

The art is gorgeous, evoking a fairytale feel while having enough leeway to be downright creepy and sometimes gruesome.

The art seals the deal, and the comic wouldn't be half as good without it.

More artists need to use watercolours for the entire comic (I'm looking at you Dustin Nguyen). Just because you can use digital colours for everything doesn't mean you should.

Just as the comic wouldn't be the same without the art, it wouldn't work if it wasn't for the writing.

The Writing

The dialogue is pretty good - all the dogs have individual voices. The plots are all very interesting and unique, the shorter stories and the longer stories are both paced very well, no bits that stick out as unnecessary or overly melodramatic. The narration, something I usually shy away from in this medium, is rather well done.

What really gets me, what's really important - is that you care about the characters. You believe these characters. Some scenes are genuinely heartbreaking or heartwarming, and that counts for a lot. So kudos, Evan Dorkin.

Other

One weird little nitpicky thing I have is with the lettering. The original lettering for the short stories is done by Jill Thompson (I'm pretty sure), and she's pretty decent with lettering. Her lettering has a character to its own that is hard to replicate. I get the feeling she hand-draws it like she does everything else, so it looks awesome. If you look closely at the bolded words you see inconsistencies and gaps that make a rather neat effect. The lettering itself is unique and carries a lot of emotion like everything else in this book.

For the main mini, the lettering changes. I'm assuming this is Jason Arthur here. While it's not bad lettering, per say, it looses a lot of the character and you can tell it was computer made. So for me it's a little jarring. It makes sense that you'd want to lift the burden of the lettering off of Thompson's shoulders, especially considering she's doing the colouring too, but I still miss it.

The extras are few, but neat, and not anything you haven't really seen before in terms of works in progress.



So all in all, Beasts of Burden is a good, unique comic that you really should be reading.